The Marauder and the Prefect
by NeonDomino
Summary: A collection for my Sirius/Hermione fics. [One] Red-String-of-Fate!AU. [Two] Time-Travel!AU [Three] Fake-Dating!AU [Four] Prank-War!AU [Five] Charity Auction!AU [Six] Once-Upon-A-Time!AU. [Seven] Stripper-Sirius!AU. [Eight] Sex-tape. [Nine] Soulmate!AU [Ten] A Star is Born - Hermione and Sirius await the birth of their son.
1. Sealed With A Kiss

**Sealed With A Kiss**

* * *

"So Kitten, happy eighteenth birthday," Sirius said, spotting the girl in the kitchen doorway. "I thought I'd have more time to prepare myself, rather than you coming to find me at four-am."

"I'd actually rather catch you before you have the whole 'I'm too damaged and dangerous' speech prepared," Hermione replied, smiling softly. "I couldn't sleep. This is a conversation we should have had a year ago -"

"You were on the run... plus you're a Muggleborn. You said that your parents understand the red strings from our world, but you're not considered an adult until you're eighteen there. I thought it'd make it easier on them too."

"They... they already know about you," Hermione admitted. "I told them two years ago. At first they weren't pleased, but I've shown them books on Soulmates and on bonds. They are more accepting on the fact now. When I was a kid, they just assumed that it was all just a game I was playing."

...oOo...

 _Ever since she could remember, Hermione had been able to see the string on her finger. Her parents stared at her in confusion when she had asked them about theirs, explaining to her that there were no strings and acting as though it was a game that Hermione had invented._

 _From what she could see, she was the only one with a string, but she reasoned that people only saw their own - assuming that the string was part of them. She couldn't understand why no-one else she knew could see their own._

 _It wasn't until Professor McGonagall from Hogwarts showed up, that Hermione realised that it was entirely possible to have a string, though the Professor had seemed deeply concerned when Hermione mentioned the colour of her string._

 _Hermione didn't understand it. The string was a dark-grey and she had assumed that all strings were that colour. But she was smart, and it took just the expression on the older Witch's face to tell her that her assumptions had been wrong._

 _When Hermione found time to herself, once at Hogwarts, she finally went in search of books that would help her. She didn't mention the colour of her string again._

...oOo...

"Am I that predictable?" Sirius asked with a grin. "I do worry that I'm too old and dangerous for you, but I know if it were someone else... like Remus, that was your Soulmate, I'd be telling him to go for it. What does he have to lose. That's what he's been saying to me actually - that after everything, I should let myself finally be happy."

"And Harry?"

"He's been quite accepting over the matter," Sirius replied. "He just wants us both to be happy, whatever we chose to do... but..."

He trailed off and stared into his cup of tea for a long moment, before meeting her gaze. "But before I even consider this, I need to know how you feel about the bond. You may not want this. I know there are... there are ways to break the bond."

...oOo...

 _Hermione spent the next few years looking at her string as she lay in her bed, whether it was at home, at the Weasley's house, or at the castle. Her research had explained to her that grey meant suffering. The darker the shade, the worse it was._

 _Hermione's was so dark it was almost black._

 _She quite sensibly told herself that, as a thirteen year old, there was nothing at all she could do about her string, nothing she could do to help her Soulmate._

 _After all, the string had been grey since her earliest memory - so whoever was at the other end was able to hold on until Hermione was actually able to find him and save him._

 _But before she could even start considering making plans about it, she watched the grey lessen, the string turning to a deep red, which still held traces of the grey._

 _It wasn't the shade of red she had wanted her string to become, but it only held traces of grey, and for that, she was happy._

 _Whatever suffering he had been through, it seemed that it was over, for the most part._

 _Hermione didn't make the connection between her string changing colours and Sirius Black escaping Azkaban._

...oOo...

"Break the bond?" Hermione asked weakly. That was one line of the conversation that she hadn't anticipated coming up. In fact, so far in her research, she hadn't even realised that it could be broken.

But maybe that was because not once had she considered not being with her Soulmate as an option.

Sirius nodded. "It has to be mutual," he said. "We'd both have to do the spell, it would cut the string. That'd allow you to be with anyone else who doesn't have a connected string."

"But... why would you do that?"

"Kitten, you're tied to an old ex-convict," Sirius said tiredly. "I won't take offence if you decide that."

Hermione headed towards the kettle, tapping it to heat the water to a boil. She began making tea, and fixed an additional cup for Sirius.

She set them down at the table, before pulling out a chair and sitting down facing him.

"How does it work when you don't have a string at first?" she asked.

"What do you mean?"

"The books only say that the string is white. But does it lead anywhere?"

Sirius smiled as he thought back.

...oOo...

 _The man ranted and raved and Hermione stood, clutching Harry's arm, scared that the man was going to hurt him. But there was no anger running through the bond as he looked at Harry, only hope and anticipation._

 _She stayed silent, watching events play out, with her Professor rushing in, embracing the escaped convict. She listened carefully, trying to make sense of what they were saying._

 _How could she believe that Peter was still alive? That he was Ron's rat?_

 _But her eyes moved down to her hand and she found herself examining the string. She had a feeling she could trust him._

 _His eyes moved down to her hand. "What..." he began. "Crap, I forgot you'd be so young... Remus, it's her!"_

 _The two boys behind him look confused, but the Professor knew what the words meant. "She's fourteen," he murmured. "Don't burden her with this right now."_

 _"You're right," Sirius whispered. His gaze met Hermione's. "On your seventeenth birthday, we'll discuss this. Now..." his gaze moved to Harry. "Onto more important things. Give us the rat and we'll prove that it was Peter. Trust me."_

 _Hermione hesitated, watching the two men whose gaze kept moving back to her. "Give them the rat," she managed._

...oOo...

"It was strange actually," Sirius explained. "The string wasn't actually white, it was more transparent with a white shimmer through it. Black means your Soulmate has died, but white means that they have yet to come into the world."

Hermione nodded, fascinated.

"We were all gathered at the Potter's house that evening. Peter had made himself scarce, claiming that his mother was sick. Remus was mourning the loss of the Prewett Twins still, his strings going black, not that we knew this at the time. We didn't even know he had found his..." Sirius' voice trailed off. "You know Remus, he didn't want to burden anyone with the knowledge."

"Poor Remus," Hermione whispered, causing Sirius to nod.

"We were eating dinner and I reached out for the pepper. I had given up by that point that the string would ever turn red, but I saw the string turn pure white. The others around the table saw it too, only for a few seconds though. It changed from pure white, slowly becoming red. They couldn't see the red string, only I could."

"So you knew how old I would be?"

"I did," Sirius confirmed. "I didn't set out to find you, because you were a baby and that would have been creepy. I had decided to wait until either you came to find me, before meeting you, or until you were seventeen."

"So... was I what you expected?" Hermione asked nervously.

"Kitten, I could never have expected someone as amazing as you," Sirius replied.

 _...oOo..._

 _Hermione and Harry hid in the forest, Buckbeak next to them. "It's almost time," Hermione said._

 _"Hermione... can you tell me what happened back there?" Harry asked._

 _Hermione hesitated. "Nothing at all -"_

 _"Sirius knew you. Why did he know you? Why was... what will you discuss on your seventeenth birthday?"_

 _"Promise you won't be mad at me," Hermione said. "But do you have one of those strings?"_

 _"Yeah I do," Harry said. "But it... Merlin, Hermione. Where does yours lead?"_

 _"I think you've worked it out," Hermione said, not meeting his gaze. She glanced at her hand. "He's terrified," she whispered._

 _"How can you tell?"_

 _"Strings can change colour with extreme emotion," Hermione explained. "And since it stopped being grey... when he escaped Azkaban, I now realise, it's been changing faster than I can keep up with."_

 _"Is that why you trusted him so quickly?"_

 _Hermione nodded her head. "Doesn't yours... does it change colour at all?" she asked._

 _Harry just shook his head. "It darkens slightly and lightens slightly, but he... uh..." he rubbed his neck awkwardly. "I mean..."_

 _"It's okay, I'm not going to judge the person at the end of your string," Hermione said with a smile. "Just don't judge me on mine."_

 _"Do you think it's time yet?" Harry said, changing the subject, though he moved a bit closer to Hermione._

 _"I think it is," Hermione whispered. "Let's go and free Sirius."_

...oOo...

Hermione couldn't help but smile. "So... if this is based on what I want, what if I want us to give it a try?" she asked. "I mean, the world made you wait for a Soulmate, so it was clearly quite picky over who you should be with. It wouldn't have bonded us if we weren't meant to be, right?"

"Are you sure?" Sirius asked, leaning forward on the table and reaching for her hand. "Being together will change your life... and I'm not just talking about how good the sex would be."

She snorted. "A bit ahead of yourself, Sirius," she replied.

"I meant that I'm the heir to the Black family. There would be a lot of pressure on you, media attention -"

"You mean even more than there is now?" Hermione asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Good point," he said. "I'm happy for this to happen as long as you are."

"I am."

"Should we seal this with a kiss?" Sirius asked, leering at her.

Hermione slipped out of her chair and moved around the table. Her lips brushed Sirius' softly before she wished him a good night and left the room.

"Merlin Witch, you'll be the death of me," he whispered, as the door closed behind her.

* * *

 **Thanks to Lynn for betaing.**

* * *

 **Review Please :)**

* * *

Bad Movie Tuesday Challenge - Soulmate!AU

OTP AU! Competition II - Red String of Fate!AU


	2. Into The Future

Written for the OTP AU Challenge III - Timetravel!AU

Ultimate Battle: (Normal) Hawaiian Shirt [upper body armour] - price: 500 words, an unusual but possible pairing (For example: Tonk/Harry, Hermione/Viktor, ect.)

Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry - Major and Minor Arcana: Write about a character experiencing an event which is shocking and sudden (at least, to them) and forces them to rethink entire segments of their lives, in relation to the meaning of the card.

Bad Movie Tuesday - Betrayed

* * *

 **Into The Future**

* * *

Hermione and Harry fell backwards at the impact of the light hitting them. Hermione seemed to be almost surrounded by the light and Harry called her name, quickly scrambling over to her.

Relieved that she seemed unhurt, he reached out a hand to help her up, but she ignored his outreached hand, instead was hesitantly accepting the help of another dark-haired wizard, her mouth gaping open in surprise.

Harry looked around. He had thought the room was empty before the light, and his eyes widened at the sight before him. Two dark-haired Wizards had joined them. One was offering his hand to Hermione and the other was frowning as he took in his surroundings.

The Wizard near Hermione barely shot Harry a glance, but he managed to make out the hiss coming from his mouth.

"Back off, Potter, this one's mine."

Hermione stared at him and then at the slightly younger Wizard standing next to him.

"Are you really that stupid? That's not Potter," the second Wizard said, his eyes raking over Harry appreciatively.

Hermione was pulled to her feet and stumbled forward into the Wizard's arms. "Now, isn't that better," he murmured, his hand sliding down her back to rest on her arse.

...oOo...

"You hit me," he shrieked, stumbling backwards. "Why would you do that? My beautiful nose is broken!"

"Finally! A witch that can handle herself," the younger said, turning his gaze from Harry to Hermione. "So... as much as my brother is oblivious to anything other than an attractive girl, I'm a bit more observant. Where are we and who are the both of you?"

Harry continued to stare between the two wizards in utmost confusion. "Hermione," he squeaked in a very unmanly way. He cleared his throat. "Something has gone... terribly wrong here."

"No, it hasn't," Hermione decided. "I think we need to send for help."

With a flick of her wand, an otter appeared and quickly shot from the room, leaving the three Wizards and Witch alone. It was only a minute before the door slammed open.

Remus Lupin stood in the doorway, his gaze finding Harry before moving to Hermione. Finally it landed on the two wizards - one of which was clutching his nose and whimpering. He only allowed himself a moment of shock at the sight.

"Let me guess," he began, fixing his amused gaze on Hermione. "Padfoot couldn't keep his hands to himself?"

"Moony?" Sirius asked, his nose promptly forgotten. "Why are you so old?"

Remus came further into the room. "I don't think our spell worked correctly," he muttered, mostly to himself. "It pulled the younger version into the future and brought Regulus too?"

Sirius started laughing. "Of course it did," he scoffed, through his laughter. "Where did you get the age potion?"

Regulus nudged him. "Sirius, they are telling the truth," he hissed. "What do you remember last?"

"A good night out with friends," Sirius immediately replied. "We just took on some Death Eater nutters, and..." he trailed off, his gaze narrowing at Regulus. "You're not being a very good spy you know - I know you're a Death Eater and -"

"What year?" Regulus interrupted.

Sirius looked at him like he was insane. "1979, of course," he snickered.

"Let me guess. November, 1979?" Regulus asked. "Because the last thing I remember was Inferi..."

"When you died," Harry added.

The laughter stopped. "Wait, you died?" Sirius asked, grabbing his brother's arm. "You let yourself die? What is the matter with you!"

"Yes."

"I think I understand what's happened," Hermione said, looking towards Remus. "Maybe we should sit down first?"

Remus nodded in agreement. "Lets head to the kitchen."

He led the way from the room.

"This place looks fam... why in Merlin's underwear, are we in Grimmauld Place?" Sirius demanded.

...oOo...

Hermione held the warm cup of tea in her hands, ignoring the way Sirius was staring at Kreacher in disgust, as he clung to Regulus' leg. She couldn't help but stare as Regulus patted him awkwardly on the top of his bony head.

Hermione slipped off her necklace.

"That's a time-turner," Sirius said.

Hermione shook her head.

"Me, Remus and Harry were researching a spell to bring you back to life, Sirius," Hermione began. "There was a large chance the spell wouldn't work. It was one we found in the library here, though, so we didn't want to share what we were doing with anyone else."

"Blood magic?" Regulus asked.

"Something like that," Remus replied, with a slight nod of his head.

"This time-turner is actually a time-collector. It was made by us for the spell. We used the design of a time-turner because it just seemed to work. What it does is it was supposed to collect time and then use that to restore the person who the spell was cast for."

"So that was me. So why is Reg here, not that I'm complaining... and why am I younger than you were expecting?"

"One flaw, was that the spell required you to have a body," Hermione explained softly. "You went through the veil, so we weren't certain if you had a body left or not. We applied the spell, hoping that you did."

"I don't understand," Harry muttered.

"I think that since there was no body for the spell to fixate on, it went to the closest match, which was Regulus. We wanted it to pull Sirius from the moment of his death, instead it pulled Regulus from the moment Regulus was about to die," Hermione said.

"So, why is Sirius here if it decided to bring Regulus?" Harry asked.

"Because the spell was designed for Sirius," Remus explained. "We used the hair to bind the spell to him. It had to bring him too. It took him from the same moment."

"Wait, so Regulus was dying and I was getting pissed with my mates?" Sirius asked, looking quite pale. "What year is it now?"

"1999," Remus said, with a faint smile.

"And I'm dead? Where's James? Lily? Peter?"

"Did Barty..." Regulus began hesitantly.

"They're all dead," Remus said softly, looking between the pair. "I'm so sorry to have to tell you both. They died because of the wars."

"Wars?" Regulus asked, looking at his older brother, who looked like he was about to have a panic attack.

"Harry, get Sirius a calming Drought," Remus ordered. "Sirius, I'm sorry to have to tell you what happened to our friends, but here goes."

...oOo...

It was after midnight when Hermione headed downstairs for a drink. She noticed light from under the sitting room door and pushed it open, finding Sirius sitting on the floor, tear-tracks on his face.

On sight of Hermione, he quickly swiped them away, attempting a cheeky grin.

"Alright beautiful?" he asked, moving towards her. "I'm head of my house now. Play your cards right and you could be Mrs heir of..." he trailed off as her arms wrapped around him, pulling him into a gentle hug.

"Right now I might be a stranger to you, Sirius, but, to me, I've known you for years. We helped you escape the Dementor's Kiss and we lived here with you for so long. You made it clear that if we ever needed anything, you'd be there to help us. Now I'm offering that to you."

"There is one thing I need," he muttered into her ear.

Hermione waited for him to make a crude sexual innuendo.

"I need this," he whispered, hugging her back just as tightly. "I don't know what to do, Hermione. I'm suddenly the head of a house and family name which I despise everything it stands for. There's so much expected of me, pure-blood marriage -"

"Sirius, didn't you just say that you were the head of the family?" Hermione whispered. "That means you are in charge. You make your own choices, so whether you want to marry a pureblood or just be a bachelor forever, is your own choice. You have a chance to turn your family name into something you can be proud of."

"You're right," he murmured, not loosening his hold on her.

...oOo...

The next day saw the flirty Sirius back again. He strutted around the house, examining the changes made. He froze in the kitchen, staring at the small boy at the table.

"There's a kid here. Are you insane? You let a child into Grimmauld Place?"

"This is my son," Remus replied. "Teddy, this is your Uncle Sirius."

"You have a son?" His eyes moved to Hermione and he gave her a betrayed look.

"With your cousin," Remus added quickly, noticing the look.

Sirius stared at him for a long moment.

"Which one?"

"Dora," Remus replied.

"Little Dora? You knocked up little Dora?"

"I married her," Remus quickly said, looking at the wand that Sirius had drawn. He fixed Sirius with a level stare. "And I suggest you don't point your wand at me in front of him, Sirius."

Sirius frowned as he slipped the wand away again. "So... the war, did she..."

"Yeah," Remus replied sadly.

...oOo...

It was strange living with a younger Sirius Black, Hermione decided, watching him discreetly from across the party. In public, he was loud, entertaining and flirted with her to the point of making her turn bright red in embarrassment.

But in private, well, that was another story. Sirius was a lot softer. She found herself captivated by his attentions, unable to even look away at times. He was a lot smarter than he acted, able to match her in any topic she turned the conversation around to.

It was like she was seeing the softer side of Sirius when they were alone together.

She was snapped from her thoughts as Ron moved in the way, blocking her view of Sirius in leather trousers. Not that she was staring of course.

"Hi Hermione," he began, awkwardly. "So... how are you?"

"I'm fine, Ronald," Hermione replied. "And you?"

"Yeah, I'm... I'm fine," he muttered. "So... I wanted to talk to you about... you know, earlier this year when... the mistake?"

"Oh, when you cheated on me?" Hermione asked, raising her eyebrows.

"Yeah... that," Ron said. "I was just thinking... I've not been with anyone else since, just to prove to you -"

"There you are, Kitten." Arms wrapped possessively around her waist and lips pressed against the side of her neck. "Merlin, I can't stay away from you for more than five minutes."

Hermione was frozen, not sure what was going on and the arms tightened. "So, luv, do you want to find an empty room?"

"Sirius!"

"You... you and him?" Ron spluttered. "You're cheating on me with him?"

"Ron, we broke up months ago," she stated coldly. "Whatever I am doing with anyone else is none of your concern."

"You're not denying it," he accused, his eyes narrowed. "I can't believe you would do this. It's Sirius Black!"

"Oh, she knows my name," Sirius purred, his fingers splaying over her stomach as he met Ron's gaze. "She tends to say my name a lot. She used to say Merlin's name a lot too, but I don't allow other men's names in our bed."

"Come on, Sirius," Hermione said, detaching herself from his grip, though he managed to wind his fingers through hers. "Lets go and get a drink."

"Is this your way of trying to get me alone?" Sirius replied with a smirk. "Because I think that's an excellent idea. I mean, you wore a dress, so a quickie -"

"Sirius Orion Black," Hermione snapped, managing to get him out of the room. "What was that?"

"He was bothering you and the little redhead was bothering me. Two birds with one stone."

Hermione's gaze narrowed.

"Look, Kitten, I meant what I said, I only want you to say my name in bed... or scream it if you prefer, and I only -"

His hand rested on his sore face as he watched the Witch walk away.

...oOo...

"Sirius, this has to stop," Remus said, pacing the room. "Hermione is family to me, and so is Harry." His gaze moved to Regulus.

"Hey, it's not my fault if Harry didn't realise he was in the cupboard. I didn't turn him gay," Regulus said defensively. "He's the one that's following me around like a little lost dog... kinda like how Sirius is following Hermione around actually."

"I know, but you need to back off. If he's just worked it out, he's most likely freaking out about it and, instead of turning every situation sexual, you should try supporting him through this and helping him."

Regulus nodded, turning his gaze away and Remus turned back to Sirius.

"And you... just what are you doing to Hermione? What game are you playing this time, Sirius, because I swear to Merlin that If you hurt her -"

"Hurt her? I wouldn't do that!" Sirius exclaimed.

"Than explain yourself."

"Hermione... she's the one, Remus," he explained.

Remus stopped pacing, staring hard at Sirius. "What?"

"She's the one! I turned up here and she's the first sight I saw. She brought me here, saving me from a life in Azkaban. My old life, she and Harry freed me. She's smart, pretty, fascinating... and did you see the passion in her eyes the times she's slapped me?"

"She's hit you more than once?" Regulus asked. Why?"

"I told her that I only want her to say my name in bed and she took it the wrong way."

"Is there a right way?" Regulus asked.

"Yes," Sirius pouted. "I was trying to say that I only want to say hers, but she hit me first."

Remus was still staring.

"Moony, where will I ever find a Witch with such passion?" Sirius asked. "How do I win her heart? Should I buy her a ring?"

"No," Remus almost shouted. "Don't propose to her. I think what you need to do is talk to her. Without making things sound sexual, just lay how you feel on the line. Also, know that if you hurt her, it's not me you have to worry about. It's the son of James and Lily."

Sirius gulped.

...oOo...

"Kitten, you're going to listen to me," Sirius demanded, storming into the library. He glared at the book she was reading until she had placed it aside.

"Sirius."

"Right, well, I've been doing a lot of thinking and I like you... I fancy you. I want to date you, Hermione. You're beautiful, smart, interesting, brave, perfect -"

"Okay, get to the point," Hermione interrupted, not wanting Sirius to list random words to describe her. It made her uncomfortable.

"The point is that I'm not looking to date you for a few weeks and dump you," he said. "I want to actually date you seriously. Officially. I've even got a courting bracelet. It's a Potter family one because all the Black ones are cursed against Muggleborns..."

"You want to court me?" Hermione repeated.

"Well, Remus told me not to propose. He thinks I'm being too dramatic, so I thought a bracelet would do instead."

"Why?"

"Didn't you hear my reasons? On top of those, every moment I've been here in the future and I've been scared of where I am, and the world today, sad over everything that we've lost.. you've been there with me. You've held me, you've talked to me, you've helped me adapt and adjust. I can't picturing this all without you anymore, Hermione. I'm serious about you, I'm so serious, that I'm actually saying 'serious' without turning it into a pun."

He paused, taking in her unreadable expression, hoping she would answer. The box with the bracelet was clutched tightly in his hands.

"I'll wear your bracelet," she whispered, blushing.

"Wonderful," he replied, quickly withdrawing the white-gold bracelet from the box and fixing it around her wrist. "Now, you know what would look good with that bracelet?"

"What?" Hermione asked.

"Absolutely nothing," he murmured, leering at her. "Should we test that out?"

* * *

 **The courting bracelet idea was borrowed from Firefly - The Same Story :)**

 **Thanks to Lynn for betaing.**

 **Review please :)**

 **2660 words**


	3. Not Pretending At All

Written for the OTP AU Challenge III - Fake-Dating!AU

Ultimate Battle: (Normal) Masquerade Mask [headpiece] (A beautiful mask usually worn at parties. Equip Effect: Ignore 2 flow dmg.) - price: 600 words, a first date between any characters of your choice

* * *

 **Not Pretending At All**

* * *

Hermione curled up on the sofa, the bowl of popcorn balanced on her lap as she turned a film on. She had too much on her mind to even think about opening a book.

The number one thing: Most of her friends were having their fortnightly group date. One that she couldn't be seen at without a boyfriend (or girlfriend).

She shoved some popcorn ungracefully into her mouth as she remembered Ron starting the event up a couple of months before. "It's a shame you're not seeing anyone," he had told her. "Otherwise you could have come along too."

The arsehole.

"What did that popcorn do to you?" came a voice.

Hermione jumped, her wand out, and she quickly tried to swallow the popcorn she had shoved into her mouth. She calmed at the sight of Sirius, lowering her wand.

"Why are you here? Not going out with your friends tonight?" Sirius asked.

"Why are you here?" Hermione asked.

Sirius shrugged. "There's a file Harry was going to give me tomorrow, but I thought I'd get it tonight since I was bored." He made no move to search for the file, instead he threw his jacket over the back of one of the dining chairs in the corner before dropping down onto the sofa next to Hermione. "So, what are we watching?"

Hermione opened her mouth to point out that he hadn't been invited, but sighed and put the bowl of popcorn between them.

"Gone with the Wind," she said.

"What's that? Is there nudity?"

"No?"

"Then… what's the point of it?"

"It's about a woman called Scarlett O'Hara. She lives on a plantation in Georgia and has her heart set on marrying a man, Ashley. He instead proposes to his cousin -"

"Oh, so muggles do the inbreeding thing too?" Sirius asked.

Hermione smiled. "The story basically follows Scarlett as she marries the cousin's brother, her sister's love, and finally Rhett Butler. I won't tell you any more, I'm worried I'll give it away too much."

"So… lots of drama?" Sirius asked.

Hermione nodded. "Loads. Your sort of movie, isn't it?"

"Those and ones with -"

"Nudity?"

Sirius nodded. "Though I'll call it even if you want to strip down at all?" He fixed her with a hopeful gaze, but she firmly shook her head.

...oOo...

"Wow, I can't believe that happened?" Sirius said, staring at the blank screen. "I thought that once she had her revelation, Rhett would be so happy, but to just… I don't get why she went back to Tara at the end?"

"Because that was the place where she did her best thinking? Where she had her best moments and it was her true home. She returned there because she knew that it was the only place she could recover and sort everything out."

There was a long silence.

"Okay, I admit, I quite liked that movie. Do you have any more like it?"

Hermione nodded. "I have loads," she said. "I'll be doing this again in another couple of weeks, if…"

"You mean during the next couples only event?" Sirius asked, frowning. "Don't you go to any of them?"

Hermione shook her head. "No, I... who would I bring?"

"Men are falling over themselves to date you, Hermione," Sirius said. "Any of them would do."

"The guys that seem to want to date me are boring and I just can't seem to meet anyone to make it work with," she admitted. "If I found someone, I'd…"

"What if someone who wasn't boring knocked on your door next week?" Sirius asked. "You must hate missing out?"

"I do hate it," Hermione said. "Ron's stupid rule, most likely to rub it in my face that I'm alone. I bet if he suddenly became single, he'd change it to an 'everyone can go' thing rather than insisting on a group-date event.'

Sirius frowned. "That's not how you treat friends - especially the one's you've cared about enough to date," he growled. "You know what? Next time it's on, me and you are going."

"But we're both single."

Sirius shifted closer to her. "We know that, but they don't," he said. "We say we're dating and Ron can't stop you from seeing your friends."

"I… we can't!"

"Why not? It's not like I'm going to try and shag you on the pool table in a pub… without your permission," he said with a grin. "We cuddle a bit, a kiss on the cheek, some harmless flirting and handholding and it's simple."

"I don't know if we can pull it off," she whispered.

Sirius took her hand, pulling her into a standing position, just as the floo lit up, signalling Harry's return.

"Hermione," he said, huskily, bringing her hand to his lips. "I've had a wonderful evening with you. Merlin, I can't even begin to express how I feel about you, but I'm glad you've agreed to take our relationship further." His eyes seemed to undress her. But since it's our first date, I feel it's proper I leave now, otherwise I might not be able to control myself around you.. unless -"

"I couldn't," she said, playing along. "I don't think we've reached that point yet, Sirius."

"You're worth the wait," Sirius murmured. "But I'm looking forward to the day when I can fall asleep with you in my arms, love."

He reached up and tucked a strand of her crazed curls behind her ear, chuckling when it sprung free again, and then took a step back.

"Sirius? Hermione?"

They both turned, looking at Harry who was by the fireplace. "Harry?" Sirius replied, awkwardly scratching the back of his neck. "I… well, since you're here, we may as well tell you that we're -"

"I heard," Harry muttered. "How long have you been keeping this from me?"

Sirius looked at Hermione.

"Because if you think that keeping this a secret makes it so you can skip the bloody group dates, you have another thing coming," he grumbled. "If I only knew before, you could have helped keep Draco and Ron from trying to kill each other. You will be coming next week!"

He stormed from the room.

"That went well," Hermione admitted.

"Did it? Sirius asked, frowning.

"Harry wasn't angry at the idea of us dating, just the fact that it was a secret from him and that we haven't been doing the group date night, where he's obviously stressed from Draco and Rons fighting."

"Makes sense. I'll go talk to him, explain that we only started dating officially today, so he can't be too mad. I'll also get him to keep it to himself for now, because it'll be quite funny to see Ron's reaction when you bring me along."

"Ron has always been a bit scared of you," Hermione admitted.

Sirius smiled widely at the comment. "Well, that's good to know," he murmured. "Now, I'm going to talk to Harry. Are you going to be out here when I leave, or…

"I might just head to bed now," Hermione replied. "Goodnight Sirius."

"Nite, Kitten," he replied, his lips brushing over her cheek before he walked from the room. She touched the spot on her cheek.

Sirius had never kissed her before… well, outside of her teenage dreams that is. She smiled as she quickly put the popcorn bowl away and headed to bed.

...oOo...

Over the next couple of weeks, Sirius made a point of stopping in, even if it was just for a few minutes. Hermione assumed it was just for show for when Harry was about, but she couldn't deny that it was wonderful, the feel of Sirius' lips on her cheek as he said goodbye each time.

She was shocked when the group-date night came around quickly. Harry had reminded her about it, stating that he had already called up to add two more to the reservations.

"Did you tell Ron we were coming?" Hermione asked, wondering if there was any way to cancel…

Harry shook his head. "Of course not. Hermione, he may be my mate, but he's being a wanker ever since your break-up. Maybe it's time to show him that you've moved on with someone who treats you much better now. He'll stop making you feel like shit for not being able to attend any. I think he does this mostly to wind you up and make you feel left out."

"So why do you go?"

"Because I want to see how much of Draco he is willing to tolerate. I thought he would have given up by now, but clearly not." Harry sighed. "At least you'll be there this time though, it'll be fun."

Hermione tried to picture Ron's face when she walked in with Sirius, and grinned. "It will," she agreed.

...oOo...

Hermione fiddled with the hem of her black dress, pulling it down slightly. She knew it reached just above her knees, but she couldn't help the sensation that it was much shorter than that.

"Stop tugging on your dress, love," Sirius said, taking her hand to stop the movements. "We're here." Sirius stepped forward, opening the door for Hermione.

"Thank you," she said.

He smiled, offering Hermione his arm. "Don't look so worried," he murmured, looking around and spotting Harry. His smile quickly widened as he led the way to the table.

"Love, your coat?"

Hermione allowed Sirius to slip the coat from her shoulders as she looked around the table. Ron was looking quite put out at her presence, his eyes moving between her and Sirius.

She moved her gaze to Harry and Draco, smiling at each of them. Draco looked somewhat amused at the sight of his cousin, and Hermione focused on the last couple at the table.

"Neville? When did you start dating Charlie?" Hermione asked, reaching for her chair.

Sirius quickly pulled it out for her before she could, and waited for her to sit down before taking the empty seat next to hers.

"We've been together about a month, though we've just recently telling people," Neville said. "And you and Sirius?"

"Two weeks now. We were watching movies together and…"

"And it was perfect," Sirius finished. "I realised that I was happy to spend nights cuddled up with Hermione with popcorn and films, so I didn't waste any time in asking her out."

"I have to admit, it'll be nice to have another girl here," Ron's girlfriend, Louise said, smiling at Hermione. "It's just been me and all these men for the last few group outings."

...oOo...

The evening went smoothly and Hermione found herself enjoying her fake-date with Sirius immensely. He had been the perfect gentleman towards her, and Ron had been fuming for the entire evening.

Better still, he had managed to make conversation with everyone there, but he had ended up falling into conversation with Charlie the most, leaving Hermione, Neville, Draco and Harry to talk, and Ron's girlfriend tried to work out why he was sulking.

"So, I'm not big on desserts, but I wouldn't mind sharing one?" Sirius suggested. "Anything catch your eye?"

Hermione glanced at the menu, her eyes falling on the hot chocolate fudge cake with ice-cream. "How do you feel about chocolate?"

"Really? You're asking someone who lived in the same dorm as Remus Lupin, how he feels about chocolate?" Sirius laughed.

Hermione couldn't help but giggle. "Okay, that's what we're having," she informed him.

...oOo...

Hermione wasn't quite sure at what point Sirius had thought it was a good idea to feed her dessert, but she couldn't deny that she was loving this attention. It had been so long since a man had paid her this much, and Sirius wasn't just any man either.

He was Sirius Black, star of every sex dream she had from the age of fifteen upwards.

"Kitten, you seem to have some chocolate on your mouth," he murmured, thankfully stopping her from thinking about one of those dreams in detail.

"Oh," she looked around for a napkin.

"Don't worry, I've got it," he said, his rough fingers moving to under her chin, turning her face towards his.

She waited, expecting a napkin to press against her mouth, she certainly hadn't expected Sirius' lips to press instead. His tongue flicked out, slowly stroking across her bottom lip before he pulled away.

"No wait, it's still there," he said, leaning in a second time.

Her eyes fluttered shut in anticipation, but quickly opened at the sound of a chair scraping across the floor. The pair quickly turned to look at Ron, who darkly muttered something incoherent and stormed out, Louise running after him.

...oOo...

Sirius covered the table's tab, insisting on treating everyone. "Though, I don't have much of a choice about Ron," he had said. "What is the group-dating rule for people who don't pay?"

Draco drummed his long fingers on the table for a moment. "I believe it's bad manners, he would have been aware that leaving here would result in one of us paying for him. I suggest that he should not attend these little group activities for a while."

"I second that," Sirius added. "We can't have him throwing a tantrum every-time I kiss my girlfriend, can we?"

"Girlfriend?" Hermione whispered.

"Do you want to be upgraded to Fiancee?" Sirius whispered back.

...oOo...

"I had a great time," Hermione said shyly, now that they had reached her flat.

"I did too." Sirius reached for her hand, bringing it to his lips. "But I must admit that Ron ruined the moment, I think I was going to kiss you had he not caused a problem."

"Kiss me?" Hermione repeated.

"Since you asked so nicely," Sirius murmured. Before Hermione could even realise the turn the conversation had taken, his lips were on hers.

"We're not pretending anymore?" she asked, against his lips.

"I'm not." His hands slid around her waist. "Are you?"

"No," she whispered. "I'm not pretending at all."

* * *

 **Review please :)**

 **2319 words**


	4. The Prank War

Written for:

OTP Challenge - Summer Camp

* * *

 **The Prank War**

* * *

Hermione looked at the toilet paper around her cabin and sighed to herself. She knew none of the campers would be rude enough, or disrespectful enough, to cover her cabin in toilet paper.

She knew it was the Red Cabin Leader - Sirius Black, that was behind it.

She stormed up to Sirius' cabin, her fist pounding on the door. It didn't take long for Sirius to answer, swinging the door open and leaning against the doorframe.

"Hermione," Sirius said, smirking widely at her. "What a delightful surprise. I'm afraid that I can't help you with whatever you need, you see, some little snake stole toilet paper and I've been assigned to find out who it was."

"You know very well who it was," Hermione snapped. "Just because the Gold Cabin is in the lead with points, you have to do something so immature as to throw toilet paper over my cabin."

"Me?" His hand rushed to his chest dramatically. "My dearest Hermione, why would I ever want to anger -"

"Save it, Black," she hissed, turning on her heel and storming away.

Sirius Black infuriated her. He had started this pranking business when he had snuck into her cabin and stolen Padfoot, her stuffed dog, leaving only a ransom note behind.

...oOo…

Sirius Black sighed as he closed the door. He walked over to his bed, picking up the t-shirt that he had been waiting to put on and pulled it over his head.

Hermione's gaze had lingered and he knew she was interested, even if she did shout at him more often than not. He put it down to sexual tension.

He also knew that there would be a backlash from her and her cabin for the toilet papering, and he wished he could have seen her face when she opened her door that morning.

She had it coming though - she had been cruel with her computer prank. He didn't know much about typing and Hermione had removed the keys from the keyboard and switched them around, so he was unable to finish what he was writing.

The toilet paper had been an easy prank, and he felt she deserved more.

...oOo…

Hermione got her own back as Sirius came storming over, his hair soaking wet and dripping down his t-shirt, and a bar of soap in his hand.

"What did you do?"

Hermione looked back at him innocently. "What do you mean? Is there something wrong with your soap?"

"You know there is!" he growled. "It's my own soap, not a camp one. I brought it with me, and now it's suddenly not working."

"That's a shame," Hermione said "Well, if you're quite finished, I have things to do." The door was shut in his face.

Sirius stormed back to his own cabin and began to search through his belongings. He grinned as he pulled out his extra alarm clock. He wondered what Hermione would make of a 3am wake-up alarm.

...oOo…

A very tired Hermione Granger balanced a bucket of water on the top of the door. It was ice-cold, and she knew Sirius was due to come into the room.

She quickly headed away from the room, and out the back entrance of the cabin as she heard Sirius' voice from the other side of the door. She didn't want him to see her, even though it was clear who was pranking him.

...oOo…

"Hermione, Sirius," Remus began, having changed into dry clothes. He dropped the towel he had been using to dry his hair onto a chair in the corner, and took a seat behind his desk. "Now, a harmless prank here and there is fine, I can deal with that, but what I don't want is for my camp to be defaced with toilet paper, or buckets of water to ice people."

Hermione and Sirius looked at each other. Sirius winked and Hermione glared back.

"Now, as the one in charge of the camp, I need to get to the bottom of this. When did this start?"

"Princess over here can't take a joke," Sirius said.

"Me? You stole Padfoot and left a ransom note," Hermione replied. "That's where it all started."

Remus' gaze moved to Sirius. "You stole her… Padfoot?"

"It's just a stuffed dog," Sirius muttered.

"Sirius, you're a grown man. Give Hermione the dog and stop the pranks. I'm sure when you let up, she'll let up too."

Sirius folded his arms. "Fine."

"Now, I'm going to clean up the mess, that you both are at fault for, in the kitchen. I expect you both to stay in here and kiss and make up. Can you do that?"

Sirius and Hermione nodded, not looking at each other.

"Okay, and we're half-way through the Summer. I'm going to combine cabins. The Red and the Gold will now be a team, I'll let you pick your own team name. We'll have the Green and Silver cabins as the second team, the Blue and Bronze as a third and the Black and Yellow as the last team. That way, you'll have to work together, and not against each other."

With that, Remus left the cabin.

Hermione looked over at Sirius. "At least this way we'll have excellent points."

"Are you kidding?" Sirius replied eagerly. "This way, our combined points beat the Green and the Silver and we're in top place." He strode over to her. "Now, how about we kiss and make up?"

Hermione couldn't help but snort at the comment. "I don't think Remus meant literally," she muttered.

"Who knows what he means," Sirius murmured, moving even closer to her. "We're a team now, Hermione, we'll be working very closely together."

Hermione stared at the lips inches from hers. She had to admit she was very tempted indeed.

"I'll tell you what," she said. "If you can keep us in the lead, because we both know that the Green cabin usually slaughters ours, we'll kiss and make up."

Sirius grinned, taking her hand and placing his lips to it. "Don't you worry, love. We'll win," he assured her.

* * *

 **Thanks to Lynn for betaing. :)**

 **Review Please.**


	5. The Auction

Written for the OTP AU Challenge III - Charity Date Auction!AU

Stratego - Write a story about someone winning the lottery/lots of monies. (it's not won, it's inherited.)

Ultimate Battle: (Normal) Cursed Wings [wings] (Equip Effect: Changes opponent's prompts into curses/hexes.) - price: 800 words, a murder

World Adventures: (word) Estate, (word) Private, (quote/dialogue) "Real riches are the riches possessed inside."

* * *

 **The Auction**

* * *

Hermione wrapped her arms around herself as she stood in the Grand Entrance of the estate.

Her estate.

She looked up at the flowing staircase, leading to the next floor, before her eyes moved up to the chandelier hanging from the ceiling.

She didn't belong there. From her knickers, to the jumper she was wearing, and even her boots; her clothes had all been purchased in places such as Primark, or New from Primark.

She was sure that people who lived in estates like this, didn't shop in the cheaper side of the high-street shops. In fact, they probably didn't even know what Primark was.

She glanced around again, ignoring the boxes being brought in behind her, and being carefully placed down (after all, she was a girl who clearly had money). It wasn't until the driver cleared his throat, that Hermione even acknowledged him, lost in her thoughts. She handed over the money, plus a tip, and the driver was out of there in a flash.

She turned to look behind her. There had only been a few bits of furniture that she even cared about. The bed-frame was broken, so she had been looking to buy a new one, there was no need for the kitchen electricals, and her sofa was ripped.

A few floor lamps, the cushions she liked to lean against, and her bookcases were some of the only belongings worth bringing with her to the strange estate.

...oOo...

She had settled on the floor, unable to come to grips with her new home, when a red-headed woman bustled out of one of the doors, freezing at the sight of her.

Hermione briefly wondered how pathetic she looked, sitting with her back against one of the larger boxes, clutching one of her cushions to her chest.

The woman was in front of her in seconds, helping her to her feet and talking, though Hermione wasn't processing any of what was being said. She could only look around her at the estate that had been left to her by the only member of her family that she had left - one she had never known about.

The letter he had left outlined trouble he had been in. That he had wanted to reach out to her, and know her, but it was too dangerous.

The letter had been with the solicitor. The man had it for one day before the death of her Uncle. It had been all over the papers - the murder of Alistair Moody. Not once had it even crossed her mind that this Moody might be related to her mother's maiden name.

She had followed the story the same as everybody else. The judge who had put away so many of the famed gang, the Death Eaters, had been attacked in his house by an escaped convict. The convict was caught, but the man was found dead.

...oOo...

"And this is the room I've made up for you dear," the woman said, frog-marching Hermione to a bedroom. "I wasn't sure what you liked, or where about in the house you wanted to be - which floor, which wing… I just knew this was quite a private part of the house..."

"I don't know… this. This is fine," Hermione whispered. "I could fit my whole apartment in this room."

The woman smiled kindly at her. "Well, if you need anything, there's a button on almost every door frame that will alert us," she said. "We occupy the east wing."

"We?"

"Me and my family. My husband tends to the house, I'm the housekeeper and a couple of our sons are hired by your late Uncle. If… if you wish to re-evaluate what you need -"

"No, I wouldn't know where to start," Hermione said. "I think maybe I'll just meet everyone and if it just carries on as normal." She hesitated. "I'm not sure this is for me. I'm not cut out for being rich. What do I do?"

"Real riches are the riches possessed inside" the woman replied, with a smile. "You'll figure it out. I'll have Percy meet with you later, he handles your finances. In the meantime, I'll arrange for someone to show you around."

Hermione stepped forward to tell her not to, but the woman was already out of the door faster than humanly possible.

...oOo...

"Hello?" Hermione asked.

The dark-haired man stared at her, curiously. "You answer your own door?"

"You don't?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I'm too far away from it to even hear it," he muttered. "I'm Harry, and this is my boyfriend, Draco. We've been asked to show you around."

Draco looked displeased at the very idea, but Harry was grinning widely.

"Thank you, but I'm sure you have better -"

"Ignore him, something probably crawled up his arse and died," Harry replied, cheerfully. "He always looks like that and sneers at everything."

"If I'm so bad, pray tell, why are you with me?"

"Excellent in bed, my little ferret," Harry replied, winking at him. His gaze moved back to Hermione. "You were Moody's niece, and he was quite the known man around these parts. Always attending the best parties and everything. I don't think many people know about you, but once we take you out tonight -"

"Out? But… but I can't attend parties. I don't like parties, I -"

Draco shushed her, and Hermione was so shocked, that she stopped talking and stared at him.

"You don't have to come to many," Harry assured her. "They aren't all stuck up and boring. In fact, tonight there's a Charity Auction. It'd be a good way to introduce you."

...oOo...

Hermione felt uncomfortable in the dress, as she looked around. Her new friend, and his miserable boyfriend had dragged her around the shops, practically forcing her to buy stuff, before taking her to get her entire body waxed and her hair done in the hairdresser.

She was still sore.

She had to admit that she didn't look so bad, at least. She wouldn't make a fool of herself.

Harry had taken it upon himself to lead Hermione around. "Remus, I'd like you to meet Hermione Granger, the niece of Mr Moody."

The man's eyebrows raised in surprise. "So, you're the niece he mentioned."

"He mentioned me?" Hermione asked.

Remus nodded slightly. "Not to many people, just a couple of us really. He knew something was going to happen… he made me promise to watch over you, so if there's anything you need, anyone that's causing you trouble…"

"Remus, she's not a child," Harry scolded him, grinning away. "Now, where's Sirius, I'm sure Hermione would love -"

"It'll have to wait, the auction is about to start. Do you have your paddles?"

Harry shared a look with Draco, who smirked at him, causing Harry to choke on the air. Remus rolled his eyes good naturedly and turned to look at the front.

Harry disappeared, returning minutes later with paddles. He handed one to Hermione.

"What are they auctioning?" Hermione asked. She had already talked to her accountant, Percy Weasley, and knew she had enough money to basically do whatever she wanted. It was a little bit scary, but she was excited to not have to watch her money for once.

"Them," Harry said, pointing to where men were lined up in suits. "Let's go and get a closer look, shall we?"

The pair walked over to where the ten men were lining up. Hermione's eyes moved over them, and she briefly caught the eye of one near the end. He winked at her, causing her to quickly look away, her cheeks staining red.

"You going to bid?" Harry asked, twirling his paddle in his hands.

"I'm not… I don't know, I'm not sure," Hermione said, chancing another look towards Sirius, who was staring back at her. "Maybe."

Harry glanced at the men, realising where Hermione's gaze was. "With him, he always gets bought by Marlene. She's the annoying, giggly blonde who tries to dress like she's our age, but she's twice that. He can't stand her."

Hermione could only nod her head.

...oOo...

"Sirius Black, Forty years old, though you all can agree that he looks good for his age. He likes… well, you all know what he likes. He's a man that needs no introduction. Shall we start the bidding at a thousand?"

"A thousand pounds?" Hermione hissed, causing Harry to nod. It felt like too much to Hermione, but she was now one of the richest people in the country, and it was for charity.

She watched the blonde woman battle it out with the other women for Sirius Black, and finally it looked like she had won.

Hermione lifted her paddle. It could have been the heated looks that Sirius was giving her, or the fact that the blonde reminded Hermione of a girl that had tormented her, back home. Either way, she was going to win Sirius Black.

...oOo...

Half an hour later, the blonde was hesitating in her bids, but Hermione held firm. It was as though the blonde woman that had been giving her nasty looks, had come to realise that Hermione was upping her offer without the slightest hint of hesitation, and the woman was concerned about just who she was bidding against.

Finally, the bidding was over, Hermione not even sure as to how high the amount had gone. She allowed Harry to drag her to Sirius, as he walked off the stage.

"I'm not really sure what happens after the bidding?" she blurted out, looking between the pair.

"Well Kitten," Sirius began, his voice sending shivers through her. "You win me for the whole weekend. We go wherever you want, do whatever you want."

"Though you can't ask for sex, or anything like that. It's not allowed," Harry offered. "We have to remind Marlene of that every time."

Sirius grinned at Hermione. "Like I said - anything you want. I owe you, kitten. You've saved me from a weekend of antique shopping and acting like a couple."

Hermione froze and frowned. "You don't like to go antique shopping?" she pouted.

Sirius shared a panicked look with Harry, before Hermione started laughing. "You looked actually scared there for a moment," she giggled.

"You know, I think she's starting to grow on me," Draco told them.

* * *

 **Review please :)**

 **1720 words**


	6. The Beauty and the Madman

Written for: The Ultimate Battle: Once-Upon-A-Time!AU (600 words)

* * *

 **The Beauty and the Madman**

* * *

This is loosely based on Once-Upon-A-Time. I didn't focus as much on the events of the show with the arrival in town, rather some of the characters.

I know Belle was locked up, but I'm writing them as different characters than the ones in the show... so lots of changes to what you'd expect.

* * *

Hermione Granger found her life to be dull. It seemed that all she did, day in and day out, was go for a walk, and come home again to have breakfast in the small apartment that she lived in. She would eat (porridge) and wash and dress, before heading to the school.

She couldn't complain about her job - she loved what she was doing, teaching children, reading them stories… but it had always felt like something was missing, and try as she might, things never seemed to change.

It was the same faces, as though no-one came to, or left the town, ever. It was the same conversations.

But for some reason that she couldn't fathom, or understand, she still stayed in the town and carried on with the same life.

It was as though she couldn't change things.

...oOo...

"Did I ever you the story of the blue caterpillar?" the man asked, standing in the doorway of her classroom.

"Sirius! What are you doing here?" Hermione asked, curiously.

Sirius shrugged his shoulders. "I was passing by," he said. "Your car was still out front, and I thought I'd see what you were doing here after school hours, maybe tell you a tale or two?"

"Well, you've told me of the blue caterpillar, many times," she replied, with a smile.

Though at first, she had found herself wary of Sirius, who was convinced he was the 'Mad Hatter' from 'Wonderland', (wherever that was), she couldn't help but warm to him over time. He had an energy that she found she lacked.

One that caused her to wonder whether she had ever had it. Her memories of past times were strangely blank. Not that she would confide that in anyone, of course.

She also loved his stories. Sometimes it was as though he made them up on the spot, and she was fascinated by the adventures he spun, stories of a Jabberwocky, a Bandersnatch and a Red-Queen. People who were too little or two big. Sweets that made you grow, and drinks that made you shrink, and an evaporating cat, called Crookshanks.

She had grown to love the stories that he spun, and the passing in the street every day became a lot more.

Soon he was being invited over for cups of tea which he loved, along with her old friend, Harry Potter. She would secretly admire the black hair and pale skin that her best friend had, lamenting at her own boring hair. She wished her lips were as red as his, too.

She loved how good Harry was with animals too.

But most of the time, Sirius was the source of her attention.

...oOo...

Hermione didn't know what had happened, only that a stranger had come to town. Harry, distracted by the new addition to town, left his post at the hospital next to the blond man in the coma, and welcomed the stranger.

The Mayor, Lucius Malfoy wasn't up to the job, after all, hating the man the second he arrived, but Hermione didn't get involved. She had her own problems - it was as though everything was changing.

...oOo...

Hermione had been walking towards the school when it all hit her. Her memories, flooding back as though the dam on her mind had broken. Her head pounded as they flooded back in, and arms grabbed her, as she clutched her head, pulling her up.

She didn't even realise she was being carried away, until the pain finally stopped and Sirius Black was leaning over her, trying to calm her.

"Where's my beast?" she whispered. "Where's Ronald?"

Sirius moved away quickly, the concern moving away for something more guarded. "I don't know," Sirius replied. "I spent all of my time in Wonderland, Hermione. I don't even know what he looks like."

"Hermione," she whispered, the name sounding strange on her tongue. "Belle," she added, testing out the name and finding it even stranger.

"Belle?" Sirius muttered, frowning harder. "Should have guessed that one."

"Thank you for helping me, but I must be going. He needs me," Hermione said. She hesitated for a long moment. "But you look like you need me too. I could stay…"

A large part of Hermione wanted Sirius to tell her not to go, as the thought of leaving him made her panic, but he merely shook his head.

"Go and find your him."

Before she could turn to the door, Sirius had opened it and left.

...oOo...

Three days later, Sirius still hadn't shown up. Hermione had hoped he would return, as he had put his hat down when looking after her, and hadn't picked it up before leaving.

There was an information desk set up in the town hall, names, previous names, and addresses. People were being reunited with their loved ones and families.

"Hermione Granger," Harry said, having already taken charge. "The person you've been searching for is… Ronald Weasley."

Hermione stood up and walked to the front, looking around. Her gaze fell on a red-headed man, walking up to the front.

"Ronald!"

The man grinned. "Hey, Belle," he replied. "It's been a while… apparently. I go by Ron these days."

She smiled back, moving closer to him. "So… how have you been?"

"Good," he said, rubbing the back of his neck and smiling at her. "So… do you want to go for a walk?" he asked.

Hermione shook her head. "I just wanted to see you again, talk about…"

"Yeah?"

She stared at him for a long moment, expecting the feelings to kick in, but she didn't feel the same love for him as she had felt before.

Visions of Sirius filled her mind, and she mentally cursed herself. She wanted to blame the spell for making her oblivious to Sirius Black, but perhaps it was her own fault that she never noticed him… or maybe deep down, subconsciously, she had been aware that she had been in a relationship with another man.

"Talk about us," she finished, after a long pause. "I'm so sorry, Ronald, but I don't… I don't feel the same as I once did."

Ron merely nodded, his smile dropping. "You know, we've been apart for so long, following our new lives, it's to be expected. You love somebody else?"

"I do," she said. "And I chose to come and find you and ignore him, and he's going to think… I'm sorry."

"It's okay," Ron replied. "Good luck, Belle."

"I'm Hermione in this world," she corrected him, with a sad smile. He turned and left.

"Harry? Is... are you... it is you, isn't it?" came a voice from the doorway. "How could I have forgotten you?"

Hermione looked at the blond man who had woken from the coma and had gotten closer to Harry.

Harry smiled. "Draco! Have you finished visiting with your father? I heard you went straight there when you recovered."

"That evil queen?" Draco sneered. "I've had enough of him to last a life-time. You know, he did all this just to keep us apart."

...oOo...

Hermione returned to her flat, retrieving Sirius' hat. She decided that she would force Sirius to talk to her, even if it meant climbing in his window.

Well, she wouldn't go that far, but she would be quite insistent that he talk to her. She didn't want to look like a crazy stalker.

She briefly wondered, as she walked, if Sirius had anyone special that he had been waiting for.

She hoped not.

...oOo…

It took a few minutes for the door of Sirius' house to open, and she found herself staring into a pair of familiar eyes.

"Luna?"

Luna smiled at her. "Or Alice, if that helps."

Hermione's eyes widened. Alice - like in Sirius' stories. She racked her brain, trying to remember what their relationship was, but for once, her brain didn't co-operate.

"So… you're staying here?"

"I am," Luna said, smiling.

Hermione closed her eyes for a moment. Sirius had clearly left her three days ago because he had someone special waiting for him.

"I understand, would you give him his hat back," Hermione said.

"Why don't you come in and give it back to him yourself?" Luna said, grabbing her arm and pulling her into the house.

Hermione tried in vain to protest, but Luna dragged her to the sitting room, where the teacups were all set out, and Sirius was already pouring a cup. His gaze fell on Hermione, and he swallowed nervously.

"Tea?" he asked, already pouring another cup for her. Without waiting for an answer, he added in the milk and sugar, just how she liked it.

"I brought back your hat," she murmured, taking the hat from her head and placing it on the table.

"Won't you sit down?" Sirius asked. "Me and... Luna have spent three days catching up, so tell me… how was… everything?"

Hermione filddled with the hot cup. "I realised that I don't love him. How could it change so easily?"

Sirius' sharp gaze was on her, and Hermione kept hers down.

I… I expected to feel something more with him. And I don't - not with Ron anyway." She set the cup down. "Maybe I shouldn't be here, either. I'm… interrupting your reunion."

"It's okay? It wouldn't be one of Hatter's tea-parties, without someone dropping in," Luna giggled dreamily.

"I can drop by another time, once you've…" Hermione found she couldn't complete the sentence, because the thought of Sirius and Luna together made her chest hurt. Instead, she turned and rushed from the room.

Luna sighed and shook her head. "She thinks we're shagging," she informed a confused Sirius. "She doesn't know about me and Prince Neville. Maybe someone should go after her and set her straight?"

She stared at Sirius, smiling slightly.

Sirius set down his cup, picked up his hat, and placed it lovingly over his black curls, before following Hermione from the room.

He walked down the path by the river, catching up to her in minutes.

"I'm not in a realationship with her," he said, causing Hermione to turn around. "I'm starting to work out where your mind went. When you mentioned your… him, when you woke up, I thought I had lost you to him. I did go to find Alice. I was somehow unaffected by the spell - I think my mind works very differently, or maybe it's because I was from Wonderland and not from the realm which you were all from, but I remembered who I was, and who Alice was. We've been good friends ever since, but over this time, I've managed to get to know you. Hermione, I'm in love with you. I never said anything before, because I knew this day would come and I was scared of starting something, just for you to realise that you loved him more."

"I thought I loved him, but when I saw him again, I realised that I wasn't with the person I loved," she said. "It's you, Sirius. It's been you for a long time."

Sirius moved forward, pulling Hermione close, before gently caressing her lips with his own. "You have no idea how many times I've wanted to do that," he whispered.

"Maybe you should show me, rather than tell me?" Hermione suggested.

Sirius nodded. "Luna mentioned something about meeting Prince Neville. My place will be empty. Care to come over for a cup of tea?"

Hermione shook her head. "If you want me to come over, you're going to have to make a better offer than that!"

Sirius grinned. "Hermione, do you want to come over to my house, so we can get in my bed, get under my sheets and exhaust ourselves, before falling asleep in each others arms?"

"I thought you'd never ask," Hermione replied, meeting his lips again. She squealed as he lifted her up, and began to carry her back towards his house.

"Just so you know, you're never leaving my bed," he informed her.

"Is that a promise?" Hermione asked, reaching for his hat, and pulling it onto her own head.

"Yes, but only if you wear that hat and nothing else," he growled.

* * *

 **1967 words**

 **Review Please :)**

 **Cookies for anyone who can guess what character Harry was, in this fic!**


	7. The Stripper

**Written for Cards Against Humanity Challenge:**

What is Batman's guilty pleasure?  
The Female Orgasm

 **Bad Movie Tuesdays** \- [dialogue] "Your confidence is overwhelming."

 **The Valentines Making Station** \- White Roses: Write an innocent (G-rated) love scene.

* * *

 **The Stripper**

* * *

Sirius drummed his fingers on the table, waiting for Ginny to finish what she was asking. So far, her request had mentioned Hermione's birthday no less than seven times, but she was failing to get to the point.

"Sweetheart, is there something you needed from me?" he asked. "A place for a party? Something she wanted for her birthday that's out of everyone else's price-range? Whatever it is, you know I'll do it. Just quit stalling and ask."

"Stripper," Ginny squeaked out.

"A… a what?"

Ginny coughed, unable to look Sirius directly in the eye. "I was hoping… Hermione has a thing for… you can't tell her, right?"

He mimed locking his lips and throwing away the key, before leaning forward eagerly.

"Hermione has a thing for superheroes and… and older men, we were hoping you'd know someone... " she bit her lip, meeting his eyes with a hopeful gaze, before blushing and looking at the table once more. "Someone who'd be willing… we need a stripper."

Sirius stared at her in shock. "Hermione wants a stripper?"

Ginny shook her head. "Of course not," she stated. "She doesn't know what she wants. But we know she'd enjoy it."

"What's her type?" Sirius asked, repressing a sigh and mentally pulling up a list of attractive friends in his mind. Maybe he could get Remus drunk and convince him?

"Well, she likes guys… about your age. Dark hair. Sexy… she totally digs the whole leather jacket and…"

She trailed off, looking extremely embarrassed and Sirius saw through her. She wasn't asking Sirius to find a friend to strip for Hermione, she was hoping that he would offer to do it himself.

"I've got a couple of people in mind," he stated. "Where's the venue?"

"Well, we were hoping we could hold it here in the ballroom," Ginny admitted, looking calmer at the change of subject. "Can I ask who -"

"No, you cannot," Sirius replied. "But you can have the party here. I'll call in a caterer?"

Ginny nodded. "There will only be a few of us. Luna, Tonks, Hannah… no more than fifteen."

...oOo...

It wasn't hard to get the right outfit. Sirius quickly found a pair of black pants with a silver batman logo sewn on the front. He managed — with Remus' help — to get his hands on a mask too. Remus had pointedly not listened when Sirius tried to explain why he wanted the mask.

The only concern was whether the pants would cover all of him. They were small and he most certainly wasn't. He pulled the pants on to check, smirking at the sight in the mirror. Though he was in his forties, his body looked as good as it did back in his twenties — he certainly hadn't let himself go in the slightest — in fact, these days he worked harder to maintain it. His hair was still quite long and was usually tied up in a bun, but he needn't worry about that as the mask would cover his face.

...oOo...

Remus had unwillingly been put in charge of the music, frowning as Sirius showed off his costume.

"Batman, Sirius?" Remus replied.

Sirius nodded. "Don't you think he's a lot like me? A rich orphan."

"Oh yes. I realised that when I met your British butler and saw your bat-cave," Remus muttered.

Sirius' grin just widened. "Are you going to be sarcastic or are you going to help me with my mask?"

"I don't see why I can't do both at the same time," Remus muttered, grabbing the mask from the table and fitting it over Sirius' head, tucking all his hair into it. "Good luck."

Sirius scoffed. "Like I need luck when I have this all this!"

"Your confidence is overwhelming," Remus replied, shaking his head. The music switched on — a mashup of the batman theme song and a song Sirius could move to — and Sirius entered the room.

...oOo...

Hermione was looking about wildly as she was shoved unceremoniously into the chair in the middle of the room, the girls all giggling around her. Her gaze fell on Sirius and her jaw dropped as her gaze moved down his body.

Sirius wondered if she had expected a stripper. Though if she had, she probably assumed he'd walk in more clothed than this.

He sauntered over to where she was in the chair, ignoring the other girls that crowded around to get a better look, and placed his hands on the handrests of the chair. He smirked at Hermione, who had just had baby-oil thrust into her hand.

His eyes moved to the oil, before flicking back, the smirk widening. He gestured to his chest and she stared hard at him.

A smile slowly moved onto her lips and she opened the baby oil, pouring some out onto her other hand and smearing it over Sirius' chest. Passing it back to someone else, she used both hands to smear it across his chest, all the way to the pants.

Sirius moved closer, trying to remember what it was like when he had done this after leaving Hogwarts. He was almost on her lap now, his hips moving, almost brushing against her, but he kept his distance.

Hands were fighting to shove money into his underwear, and Hermione shyly added her own, looking completely mortified and turned on at the same time.

"Take it off, take it off," the other girls began to chant. Sirius ignored them, his eyes only on Hermione. He reached out, his hand lifting up her chin, and Hermione's eyes widened.

"Yes, take them off, Sirius," she murmured, her gaze moving slowly down his body.

Sirius quickly overcame the surprise that she knew it was him. "Are you sure, Kitten? I know you want to see everything I have to offer, but do you want to share that with all of the rest of them?"

She quickly shook her head. "Only me!" she admitted.

Sirius reached up for the mask, pulling it off and tossing it aside. "Happy Birthday, Kitten."

"Want to make it even happier?" she whispered, though her cheeks were red at her own words. She looked even more mortified for asking him that, though Sirius didn't mind in the slightest. He liked that he was bringing something out of the studious bookworm.

"Anything for you," he murmured.

He stood up, pulling Hermione up with him, grinning at the catcalls from the girls.

"Ladies, enjoy the rest of the party. Goodnight."

With that, he dragged Hermione out of the room, past Remus and up the stairs.

...oOo...

Sirius wasted no time in getting Hermione comfortable in his bed, making her beg, scream and plead for more from him. He took his time teasing her, before giving her what she wanted.

Hermione was a beautiful sight, writhing underneath him, barely able to string a sentence together, only able to utter his name.

Watching Hermione fall apart was suddenly his favourite sight in the world, and he hoped it wasn't a one-time thing.

"You knew it was me?" he asked as they lay together in a tangled naked mess, both drained from what they had just experienced together.

She nodded. "I wasn't sure at first, but how many strippers are that bold as to just wear the underwear?" she asked. "Plus your eyes and when you touched me — you were so gentle. I knew it was someone I actually knew, and I had already suspected it was you."

"You've had a good birthday?"

She hesitated, biting her lip. "I want to say yes, but I'm worried that this was a once-only thing. I don't usually… I didn't come to your bed just for tonight." She watched him hopefully.

"Well how about every night?" Sirius asked, relieved, his fingers gently running across her cheek and down her jaw.

"Only if you wear the pants again," Hermione said, gesturing to the tiny black underwear on the floor.

"Deal," he laughed, pulling her closer for a kiss.


	8. The Tape

**Written for:**

 **Ancient Runes: Task #3:** The reverse of Laguz means destruction. Write about a character destroying something dear to them (this can also be anything. Be creative!). (character) Hermione Granger

 **National Yoga Month** \- Bridge Pose - Write about two different people 'building bridges' - improving their 'relationship'

 **Bad Movie Tuesdays** \- North: [object] Video Tape

 **Hamilton Challenge** \- 23. [character] Hermione Granger

* * *

 **The Tape**

* * *

Hermione sat frozen on the sofa, looking at the television long after the video had finished. There were so many questions running through her head.

 _When had the video been recorded?_ Was the first that came to mind.

Had Sirius cheated on her? They had only been together a couple of months. Was he _bored_ of her? Was she not enough? The questions ran through her mind quickly.

The panic took over and she drew her knees up onto the sofa and let the tears flow for a few moments as she tried to get her thoughts together.

She thought things were going well, the past couple of months had been perfect and Sirius had insisted that he was devoted to her. It was like a dream come true, handsome, wonderful Sirius Black who only had eyes for her.

The man who could make her heart pound with just one look.

And what a fool she was. Clearly she was just falling for his lines, just like every other girl probably did.

On that realisation, Hermione forced herself off the sofa. She headed into the bedroom and grabbed the overnight bag she kept there. She didn't even bother opening the empty drawer Sirius had given her the previous week, still nervous about using it.

She had planned to leave some bits at his that weekend, but it appeared that she wasn't going to leave anything after all.

On the way out, Hermione pressed play on the video. Sirius would be back any moment after all, so at least he would know _why_ she had left.

...oOo...

Sirius headed to the Indian takeaway to place an order for some food for him and Hermione. Once ordered, he walked to the pub across the road to meet Remus for a pint whilst he waited for the food to be ready.

Half an hour after ordering, he headed back to the curry-house to pick up the food.

He was eager to get back home. Hermione was actually staying over for the first time ever. Usually she came over, but headed home that same evening (which was handy that she lived in the same building).

Tonight she was staying over. That meant naked Hermione wrapped around him all night and all morning and all weekend.

Sirius couldn't think of anything better. After all, he had waited two months without pressure until she shyly asked to stay over the night.

He tried to force the image out of his head as he got onto the motorbike and drove home. Thinking about Hermione in that way wasn't a good idea whilst driving, because it was way too distracting. Instead, he thought about work on Monday which was enough to allow him to focus on the road long enough to get home without any accidents.

He tapped on his front door hoping Hermione would answer, but there was no reply. Thinking Hermione was in the bathroom or perhaps getting naked in the bedroom for him, Sirius fished around in his pocket for his keys.

He quickly opened the door, nudging it closed before putting the food on the kitchen counter. A quick glance showed the bathroom door was open and he eagerly headed towards the bedroom.

Empty.

Sirius frowned, looking around. Hermione wasn't there. He glanced at where her bag had been placed, only to see it was gone.

Shit. Hermione was gone. He patted his pocket to find his keys and headed to the living room, wondering if something had come up. Perhaps she had left a note?

He froze at the sight of the television. Hermione had been watching porn? A moment of amusement was quickly replaced with horror when he spotted his own face on the screen.

"She found the video," he whispered.

He rushed to the door.

...oOo...

"Hermione! It's just a video." She jumped at the sound of Sirius' knock on the door and his calls through the letterbox.

She didn't make a single sound as she sat with on the floor next to the front-door, still in shock at what she had seen.

"Hermione, love? Please. Please just come and talk to me. Let me explain. It's all a misunderstanding."

"A video of you having sex with another woman is a misunderstanding?" Hermione snapped, turning to glare at the door. "What is there to explain? You've left this video in your bookcase with the rest of your movies, when you _knew_ I was staying. You were the one who told me to watch a movie whilst I waited for you to return… Were you not man enough to tell me yourself that you were tired of me? How long before meeting me did you sleep with her?"

"How long did… what? Hermione, that video is old. I swear, I've never cheated on you. Please just open the door."

"How can I trust you?" she asked.

"Because… because I'm telling the truth. Because I would never lie to you, Hermione. I would never hurt you like that. I promised that I'd never hurt you at all. Why would I ever tire of you?"

"Well, you're… you're so much older, more experienced, and maybe you wanted a woman who… who was…" she trailed off, trying to hold back the tears.

"I don't care about how much experience you have. I just want you," Sirius insisted. "Please Hermione!"

"You say you want me, but why do you have that video? If you really wanted me, you wouldn't keep a video of you with someone else."

She heard him sigh. "You're right," he murmured. She listened as the letterbox closed and held back a sob as she heard him walk away.

She wondered if he had given up that easily? Was she not worth fighting for? Maybe Sirius was right and it wasn't a big deal. Was it enough to lose him over?

...oOo...

Sirius had waited almost a year to have a chance with Hermione. Ever since Harry asked him to rent the empty apartment in his block of flats to a friend who was struggling to raise enough for a deposit for her own place.

On his Godson's word, Sirius had allowed her the flat.

Meeting Hermione however, was a different story. He hadn't expected Harry to introduce him to a beautiful girl, feisty, smart… and most certainly a minx. He didn't understand how other men seemed to overlook her as though they couldn't see these things about her.

But he had to wait. She was seeing another friend of theirs—Ron—and he wasn't about to break them up. Not when it was clear to him from the moment he saw them together that they weren't going to last long.

Instead, Sirius spent the year getting to know Hermione, becoming her friend and someone she could trust. He was one of the first to know when Hermione and Ron broke up, and, after waiting for her to get over Ron, terrified a couple of potential boyfriends before asking Hermione out himself.

Sirius wasn't going to lose Hermione over a stupid video. He would do whatever it took to make Hermione happy.

Sirius quickly returned to Hermione's door. He looked at the cover of the video for a long moment, but knew what he had to do. He pulled the front tab back, revealing the tape. He ran his finger over it, before pulling it from the video itself.

"Hermione."

"Sirius, you came back down?"

He could hear the hope in her voice. He still had a chance. He moved closer, dropping down to his knees so he was closer to the letterbox. There was no way he was going to screw this up.

"Just hold the letterbox open, will you?" he asked softly.

He could almost see the hesitation on her face before it opened.

He yanked as much of the tape as he could out of the video, feeding it through the letterbox. "This is what the tape means to me, Kitten. It's true that I never intended you to see it, but it's you I want. Do what you want - burn it, throw it in the bin… whatever you want. I'm just so sorry that I didn't get rid of it a long time ago. I should have."

"Who is she?"

"An ex. Someone who meant a lot to me. She… I haven't watched this video since meeting you. Whatever I felt for her, is nothing compared to you, Hermione. These past few months, I haven't thought of that tape a single time, otherwise I would have done this sooner, I swear." He paused, hoping she'd answer, but was met with silence. "Please," he whispered. "Please, Kitten. I love you and I can't lose you over this!"

The letterbox closed and Sirius wondered if he had gone too far. He opened it and pushed the rest of the tape through, before standing up turning to leave. Maybe Remus would have a suggestion on how to fix this mess?

"Sirius!" The door opened and Hermione rushed into his arms, clinging to him. "Did you mean it?"

"Every word," he promised. "Was there a specific—"

"I love you too," she admitted, cutting him off.

"Will you come back upstairs with me? I've got food, we can watch movies… real movies and cuddle up?"

...oOo...

Hermione curled up on the sofa, wrapped in Sirius' firm arms. Neither of them had been interested in putting any movies on, and some classic rock played from the radio in the corner.

"Say… say it again," Sirius murmured.

"I love you. Your turn!"

"I love you too," Sirius said, closing his eyes as he pressed his lips against her cheek. "One more time?"

She snorted. "Are we just going to sit here and say that, or are we going to go to bed?"

His eyes snapped open. "I thought I'd end up sleeping on the sofa or something," he replied.

"I couldn't ask you to give up your bed like that. I was just going to make you sleep on the floor," she teased.

"Cheeky minx," Sirius replied. "Let me lock up and I'll follow you in." He watched her walk from the room, his eyes fixed firmly on her arse. "Beautiful," he murmured before standing up.

He quickly checked the doors and windows before unplugging the radio. The lights were switched off as he left the room, and he headed into the bedroom. He froze at the door, his eyes fixed on Hermione wearing nothing but lingerie.

On his bed.

Maybe it was time to make a new video?

* * *

 ** _Review please :)_**


	9. A Sensitive Place

**Written for:**

Convince Me Challenge: Pairing - Sirius/Hermione

Leapfrog Challenge: Pairing - Sirius/Hermione

Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry:

Daily Prompt - (Word) Soulmate

The New York Zodiac Writing Challenge - Animal Prompts: Rooster - Write about Hermione Granger

* * *

 **A Sensitive Place**

* * *

 _Based on a conversation with friends._

 _Based on the soulmate trope where you are born with your soulmate's first words to you on your skin._

 _After reading through the book, the first words between the pair wouldn't work, so I went by movie_

* * *

Hermione pushed her hair from her eyes, watching as Sirius stepped into the room after her.

"You left the table quite quickly," he observed, his dark eyes searching hers.

"And you left just so you could get me alone," she responded with a smirk. "So… there's one thing I've wanted to ask since I was thirteen, but you made me wait—"

"Love, you were a kid back then. What do you take me for? I said we wait ten years because you had a life to live. I was giving you time to move on and forget about me."

"Well, ten years was a long time. You could have said eighteen. But I've waited all of this time and I still want my soulmate. You said my words, Sirius."

"Romantic, right from the start," Sirius murmured. "You said mine too. It really threw me off my game. I hadn't expected…" he sighed. "You said: _'if you want to kill Harry, you'll have to kill us too!'_ Having that written on me scared me. I never told James or anyone what it said. So when he had Harry… when he wanted me to be the secret keeper, I couldn't do it. I thought that I would somehow betray him because of the words on my skin and that's why I asked for it to be Peter. I should have trusted myself better; I could have told myself that there were other people called Harry out there and it could be one of them."

"But you knew it would be about our Harry?"

"It was too much of a coincidence," Sirius said, shrugging. "But in Azkaban, it gave me some hope. It told me that if it was about Harry, I'd escape and see him again. I knew I wouldn't go to kill him but it finally made sense with how the world saw me."

"How do you think I felt with mine?" Hermione replied with a laugh. "Not the most romantic words to have tattooed on my hip."

Sirius' gaze immediately moved to her covered hip and Hermione lifted her top slightly, pulling down the side of her jeans, revealing the words.

 _'No, only one will die tonight.'_

"In fact, me and my mum went over all of the ways that sentence could be more innocent than it sounded. Computer games, drama class, at a poetry reading... It wasn't a very long list."

It was Sirius' turn to laugh. "So, what do you want, Hermione?" he asked, getting back to the point. "I've waited for you to move on, but you don't seem to want to. What you do seem to want is for me to make a move."

"Why wouldn't I want my soulmate to make a move?" Hermione said, moving closer and placing a hand on his arm. Sirius' eyes watched her carefully. "I'll be clear, Sirius. You're my soulmate. I want to be with you."

Sirius smirked. "Of course you do," he said, taking a step towards her, taking her hand in his. "If you're sure…"

"Oh I am," Hermione insisted. "So… the words. Can I see them?"

"I'm not sure. They're in a… sensitive—"

"Please," Hermione murmured. "I've waited ten years to see."

Sirius nodded. "Okay." He reached down and began to open his trousers, causing Hermione's eyes to widen.

"Sirius?"

He paused. "I did tell you it was in a sensitive place," he said.

"On your arse?" she squeaked. "Sirius…"

Sirius shook his head, smirking cockily at her. "Of course not love. Somewhere much more enjoyable. In fact, there will be times—if you'd like that is—that you'll be able to eat your words, if you catch my drift." He winked at her as her shock faded from her face. "Do you still want to see?"

...oOo...

Hours later Harry helped a dazed and sore Sirius up from the floor. "What did you say to her to piss her off so much?" he asked.

Sirius shrugged, before reaching up to rub his aching head. "Nothing," he insisted. "I was my usual charming self!"

* * *

 **Review Please :)**


	10. A Star is Born

Written for:

Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

Psychology - Melancholic: loyal, careful, family traditions (naming), persistent, patient.

* * *

 **A Star is Born** ****

 **Sirius and Hermione wait for the arrival of their child.**

* * *

Hermione hunched over on the edge of the bed, mask in hand as the doctor prodded at her back. As the contraction hit, she pulled the mask to her mouth and sucked in a deep breathe of gas and air. Her body shook.

"You need to stay still," the doctor scolded, as the tube was inserted into her back. "If you move, this may not go in right."

"I'm trying," she muttered crossly. Of course he didn't get it. He was a man. He didn't _understand_ how bloody painful the contractions even were. Pain was ripping through her body and he thought she was moving for the fun of it, she supposed.

She glared at Sirius who was standing on the other side of the bed, as she couldn't see the doctor behind her.

Another contraction hit and she froze completely still, trying not to let it take over. "Lean down more," the doctor complained. Hermione hunched over more, allowing the process to continue. Her back was feeling strange now. There was an odd feeling that she couldn't describe. Her skin felt speckly, though she was getting high on the gas and air, which could also explain why she couldn't think of a word.

She felt a hand push her back down more into an almost uncomfortable pose. She tried to maintain it, though the next contraction had her moving slightly again. She huffed. How anyone could stay still during a contraction was beyond her. She breathed in the gas and air and decided to ignore the rude doctor. Maybe if he turned up two hours before like he was supposed to and did the epidural then, he'd have managed better. After all, the contractions weren't very painful or close together two hours ago.

"Doing well, love," Sirius said cheerfully. Hermione couldn't move to see him anymore, but she wanted to slap him. She was sitting there in agony having a tube shoved in her back. She'd like to see him do better.

"I am going to kill you," she hissed. "If you say anything like that again, I will make your life hell. You think prison was bad, well, that's nothing compared to what you'll have at home. Do I make myself clear?"

"Crystal," Sirius said, sounding scared, though his voice held an edge of amusement. Hermione knew he was smiling and if only she could reach out and wipe that bloody smile off his face, she was sure that she'd be happier coping with the pain.

"Okay," the midwife said, smiling as she walked over. The doctor walked away and Hermione straightened up, her back aching and the tube feeling weird. "You can't get up now you've had that in."

Hermione glared at the floor, but the midwife paid her look no mind. "Now, I need to check how much you're dilated. Lay back again please, Mrs. Black."

Hermione let out a small sob as she carefully moved back onto the bed and lay down. Her back felt uncomfortable.

As the woman began to check, Hermione pulled the gas and air to her mouth once more.

"Not too much of that," the midwife insisted, with a large smile that Hermione hated. Why was everyone so happy? She took another pull of the gas and air just to spite her, shooting her husband with a glare at the same time, daring him to say something.

"Oh dear. He's not moved at all," the midwife said. "I have to consider the fact that you have a narrow birth canal and that we may have to move you to surgery."

"Surgery?" Hermione whispered, the mask removed from her face. She looked at Sirius in a panic. "Sirius?"

"It's alright, love." He took her hand and brought it to his lips. "You'll be fine, I promise."

"But… but they'll cut me open… and the baby… will he be fine? Why is this happening?"

"There's nothing wrong with the baby, sweetheart," Sirius promised, glancing up at the midwife just to make sure. "It's just that he's too settled in there."

"We're almost at the twenty-four hour mark since your waters broke. After that time, there's a risk to him. This is the safest way."

Hermione shook her head. "Can you just give him some more time?"

"One hour," the midwife insisted. "If he's close, we'll try and do this naturally. But if he continues to progress slowly, we'll have to operate. It's the safest way for you both."

Hermione nodded, grateful at the one hour. She knew her little boy would be able to do it. He was ready to meet his mummy and daddy.

...oOo...

Clearly the thought of meeting his daddy scared him. Hermione assumed it was because baby heard Sirius' bad singing and realised it'd be worse when he was out, so was determined not to be born. He was too comfortable in her womb.

But the hour was up and she was being wheeled to surgery and clinging to Sirius' hand as he attempted to pull away to put on the offered clothes. He couldn't go into surgery without sterile clothes and Hermione was shaking.

It was only a minute before Sirius was back by her side, gripping her hand, and Hermione was looking up at him, terrified.

"I don't really hate you," she whispered.

"I know," he assured her, kissing the top of her head. "You can do this."

"I can't. It'll hurt when they cut into me."

"They'll numb you," Sirius said. He stepped aside as the doctors all crowded around. Her lower body started to numb as the epidural came into effect.

"Can you feel this?" Something cold was sprayed against her arm and she nodded. Another spray down her body, but she shook her head.

She could only feel the top half of her body. The sprays continued until the doctors were satisfied that her whole body was numb.

"I feel like I'm going to fall off the table," she whispered, trying to steady her voice. "Is it supposed to be crooked?"

"Yeah, I suppose so," Sirius murmured as a screen was set up so Hermione couldn't see what was happening.

A couple of minutes of silence.

"When are you starting?" she asked.

A woman appeared, shooting her a reassuring smile. "They already have. They've started the cut."

"They… have?" Hermione stared at her in disbelief. She knew she'd be numb, but she had expected to feel _something_. "Are you sure?"

The woman nodded her head. "This could take up to an hour, so don't focus on what's happening down there, focus on whats going to happen in a few days when you bring the baby home."

"When we bring our son home," Sirius insisted, reaching a hand to Hermione's head and stroking her sweat-covered hair from her face. "You'll be a mummy in a few minutes, love. I'm going to be a dad."

"A good one," Hermione replied. She was still shaking but a little bit of fear had evaporated at the knowledge they had started.

"Not as good a parent as you. You were made for this. You mothered Harry and Ron long enough and now you're going to have a little baby to mother. So… there's one important thing we've avoiding discussing."

"We said we'd pick a name when we see him," Hermione replied. "Give it an hour and we'll choose his name."

They sat in silence and Hermione tried to lose herself in the feel of Sirius' hand stroking her hair.

"You're going to feel pressure."

"Pressure?" Hermione squeaked.

"Yes. We need to push so the baby comes out."

Hermione's mouth dropped open, but before she could say anything, she felt the pressure. It wasn't as much as she expected, though some of it was in a not-numbed area and felt weird.

A few minutes later, she heard a cry.

"It's not been an hour," she whispered.

"Closing you back up takes time," the woman insisted from her other side. "Dad, would you like to go and cut the cord?"

Sirius looked hopefully towards Hermione and she let go of his hand. "Go check on our boy," she insisted. He moved away and she could hear him cooing over their son, whilst the baby screamed. She couldn't wait to hold him, but knew she'd have to for a few minutes.

Finally they were done. The screen was removed and she was carefully moved from the room, the baby being brought by Sirius. She was eager to see him but twisting to look caused ache.

Once they arrived in recovery, Sirius placed a bundle into her arms.

"Regulus," he whispered, his eyes searching hers.

She looked down at the bundle with the black hair plastered to the top of his head. She knew how much Sirius' brother meant to him and had already considered going with a star name to continue his family tradition.

"Regulus," she agreed, bringing the bundle up so she could place her lips against the baby's cheek. He wiggled in her arms and let out a loud wail. "Though he kind of sounds like you when you're having a sulk."

"Cheeky woman," Sirius replied with a grin. He slipped an arm around her shoulder and leaned down, resting his head against hers slightly. "Can you believe it - I'm a dad. Thank you, love."

"You can show your thanks by getting me a cup of tea," Hermione replied.

"Really? A cup of tea is all you want?"

"For now. Surgery has a long recovery and I'm going to need extra help at first."

Sirius nodded his head. "Already sorted. I sent the text to Kingsley when we were moving to the recovery room saying that I want to take some of my holidays after my paternity. Of course I wouldn't leave you alone, especially after surgery."

Hermione smiled. "I know," she assured him. "I know I can depend on you."

"So… is this a bad time to ask about a second? I mean, Regulus wouldn't have fun being an only child."

Hermione glared at him. "If I wasn't holding my son right now, you'd be dead," she threatened darkly.

"I'm sure I would," he laughed. "Regulus Orion Black?"

"Perfect," Hermione agreed. "But if we ever have a girl, we're not calling her Walburga."

"Agreed," Sirius replied with a shudder.

* * *

 **Thanks to Lizzy for betaing. :)**

**Review please :D**


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